Pelangi itu pasti ada.

Assalamualaikum,Hello beautiful souls :)

So basically I'm in week 2 of new semester.4 months to go before i go for internship which i won't be doing in my hometown. I get the opportunity to go for mobility programme outside Malaysia and of course i grab the chance! Not everyone will have this chance and i do not want to regret the chance i did not take  (still waiting for the confirmation tho) Back-up plan : intern in KL. still not in KK. Im challenging myself to get out of my comfort zone in case you are wondering.

My exam result for last semester was quite unexpected (sebab lemah semangat.i've had so much exam and i feel like i cant do this anymore) but i guess i have to share some tips that might help those who are struggling with their inner strength and wanna lift up the spirit.

I print out lecture notes during study week (God pleaseee get rid of this bad habit since 1st year) If you are not a last minute person DO NOT EVER TRY THIS. So i made a study timetable throughout the study and exam weeks and basically follow it. Kalau ada chapter yang tidak sempat cover i'll just proceed with the next subject scheduled and continue the remaining chapter on the day before exam. However, i said however, i will make sure i finish everything accordingly. I don't care kalau terpaksa membaca bodoh (my term of just highlighting notes without reading them properly) because on the day before exam i will read everything again and try memorizing them. GAIS THIS IS THE HIGHLIGHT-->I read and try to memorize at least with 3 times repetition on the whole thing. Yeah sounds crazy and believe me there's not even once i don't feel like vomitting i swear! But im a slow learner  with a short term memory so by repetition only i can make myself survive the exams.

Besides, i recite doa penerang hati, ayat kursi and surah insyirah (this one my fav) everytime i feel like giving up on reading or when i need to keep my momentum to get thru life. After daily prayer i also make dua 'Ya Allah Ya Tuhanku, Tuhan yang menguasai segala ilmu di langit serta di bumi, berikanlah aku kekuatan akal dan fikiran untuk menguasai ilmu yg aku pelajari, kuatkanlah ingatanku,tingkatkanlah pemahamanku, bantulah aku dalam usahaku,kuatkanlah semangatku untuk terus berusaha. Rabbi yassir wa tu'asir, rabbi tammim bil khair. Sesungguhnya aku bertawakkal atas segala urusanku kepada Mu dan aku yakin bahawa Engkau sentiasa memberikan yang terbaik buatku. Sesungguhnya Engkaulah yg maha mengetahui akan segala sesuatu,sedangkan aku tidak mengetahui"

The last part of the dua is what made me calm because i know when ive done my part, whatever the result is i knew i have been given the best for me and there will always be hikmah in His decision. 

I dont want to give up on life. Rasa lemah semangat dan ingin putus asa is normal. Manusia mana ada yang kuat sepanjang masa. Tapi kita ada pilihan untuk hanyut dengan perasaan sendiri atau bangkit kutip semangat yang tersisa, bina harapan baru. Mungkin juga sebab aku hidup dengan mentality di akhir jalan cerita seharusnya akan happy ending. Akhir cerita tidak semestinya  bila ajal sampai. Dalam kamus aku, habis sem boleh jadi akhir cerita. Merana sepanjang sem tapi tetap tidak berputus asa akhir sem boleh cuti dengan tenang dan bermalasan di rumah.haha. Aku pernah kurang berhabis habisan melawan perasaan,kurang berusaha masa exam, akhir cerita ; masa cuti aku ada perasaan tidak puas hati coz i think i should have do more before,force myself more.Masa tu la tengah2 cuti boleh rindu study.LOL. sebab tu bila start study week aku akan paksa diri sampai rasa mau termuntah sebab terlampau tepu tu datang.haha. Akhir sem no regrets. Result belakang kira yg penting i tried my best.

Prinsip aku, selagi ada masa maksudnya masih sempat berusaha. Maksud di sini bukan membazir masa sebab masa banyak (what i did the whole semester.Im still that good at procrastination) Maksudnya walaupun sedikit masa yang tinggal i will do everything i could to save the entire semester.hahaha. Masa tu la tiba-tiba faham semua benda. If i start studying earlier i would have been a genius. I bet  most people feel the same. Orang last minute memang macam ni.LOLOLOL. So if you think it is too late to do something to make things better, you better not! because as long as you have time, you can make the difference.*trust me, what i wrote in this paragraph repeating its history every semester but i survive tho, by this principle.

Itu cerita last sem. Now im still regaining my momentum. Honestly baru awal awal ni pun rasa sikit lemah semangat pun adoyaiii. Mau mengelak pun macam sudah terlambat so i guess i'll just bear the challenges ahead. Bad things will past, i will survive, and i'll be a better human from it.

"sekiranya Allah ada dihatimu, kamu tidak akan pernah menderita"

till then!